So lets rewind. I had to have my bladder full for this appointment, and that was uncomfortable. My DH and I got there a little earlier, so I sat in the waiting room for almost 40 min needing to pee so bad. The tech was really great, explaining everything along the way. She went nice and slow. Both babies were moving all around and she was all around my stomach with that goo, I might as well just taken my shirt off.
I had a dream that one of them didn't have any legs, so she found both babies had legs, arms, hands and feet. The doctor comes in and starts reviewing my case, and tells me to start taking iron on top of everything else. Having twins, I'm at risk for just about everything. My main concern is gestational diabetes. He recommended a high protein diet, and lower carbs. I knew it was coming, so after the new year I'll have to adjust my diet. Right now, its really just been about what will stay down. Lots of pasta and ice cream, pizza. I haven't gained any weight - so that's good. Good b/c I'm already over 200lbs, so my total weight gain shouldn't get above 20 extra pounds. I imagine I'll start gaining soon as they get bigger in the next 4-6 weeks.
Scan is done, and doctor says everything looks just great. I'm having di di twins (dichorionic diamniotic). Which are apparently the best kind of twins to have, less complications. And the scan of the neck should be between 1 and 3mm and both babies were 1.7. Perfect.
Good news and bad news. Because I possibly might have maybe had a procedure called a leep procedure when I was in high school (just over 15 years ago and they don't have any records of it anymore), they want to keep a close eye on the cervix. So that means I will be seeing the perinatal doctor and getting a sonogram every two weeks until 24 weeks! But.. if my cervix starts to shorten then I'll have to get it stitched up. I honestly don't see that happening. But at least I'll get to see my babies every two weeks.
Other thoughts-
I've seen a few posts of yours about the Christmas holiday with thoughts and feelings, so I wanted to share mine too. Though this Christmas is so different from all my Christmas's before, I remember what it was like to go through a holiday feeling alone. It was a rough start for me at my clinic in November of last year. After going through a little bit more testing than the average infertile, there was a polyp found and needed to be removed, and was done right before thanksgiving. So while my family was eating and enjoying company and drinking. I was stuck at home on the couch in some pain, and still not pregnant. About two weeks later I learned that my thyroid was way out of whack and my doctor changed my dosage and wanted me to wait 9-12 weeks before starting an actual treated cycle. I was so upset. After getting so amped up from getting through all the test, having the polyp removed - I was ready to go. Gimmie that clomid! This meant, yet another Christmas no pregnant and probably not have started any sort of treatment till almost February. I almost didn't want to participate in any family gatherings because I was just to upset. At my Gram's house, there are a TON of babies, I just didn't think I could do it. But I used the opportunity to spread the word about what I was going through. No one, no one in my family has ever had to go through this. I wanted them to see where we were coming from.
ps. bringing a whole bag of Hershey kisses to work was a bad idea. 'tis the season!
ok - so during Christmas eve my cousin really wanted me to hold the newest newborn and I just didn't want to. She made a really big deal about holding the baby, HOLD THE BABY KIM! IT MIGHT BRING YOU GOOD LUCK. I got up fro my chair and went to the kitchen to hide my tears. My 'dad' then started on me. "You shouldn't be messing with this kind of science. Maybe God doesn't want you to have babies, maybe that's why your not able to have any, your going to end up with a "retard kid." Even his girlfriend chimed in and said "yea, you know, you might end up with like 6 kids. You don't want that do you?"
Saying these things in front of my family on Christmas Eve for heavens sake!!, completely embarrassing me. My dh wanted to punch him in the face. But we got through that night, and I went home and was a complete mess all Christmas long. My husband was really my rock through this time. I just kept focusing on the future, and wanting so badly for 2015 to start.
They may not say it much, or tell you how their feeling, but your family loves you so much and probably thinks about you more times in the day than what to eat for dinner. You are in a lot of people's prayers, even though you may not have your story out there yet. I hope you can feel the love. And let me add myself to your list. You are a sister from another mister to me. Going through treatments, disappointments, etc make us such a special breed of people that we can get through anything. I hope that you also have the love of the Lord on your side. It took me awhile to come back into his arms. And sometimes I still struggle with letting go and letting God. But when I did, miracles happen and they are still happening. I want that for all of you. Know that you are in my prayers and my thoughts.
We're almost there. I'll leave you with a peek of da'babies.
I hope that each of you have a wonderful Christmas. Take the time that you need to yourself, or lean on your husband. Focus on what you do have. And what could be possible for this next year. This year for sure, I've lived by a saying "it will happen the way its supposed to."
Leaving the best for last. These are copies of pictures, its hard to see. I'll have to start playing around with my printer at home to see if I can make better copies.
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| 12w 4 days. They are each about 3" long rear to head. |
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| His little hand is by his nose. We keep calling him a 'he.' :) |
I have big deadline at work, so I most likely wont be able write much until after Christmas, maybe Christmas day since I plan on being home most of the day and its my only day off really.
so until then -
With much LOVE <3
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