So, a quick little update on last week's entry. Had a chit chat with the husband, and tried to explain a little bit more of where I was coming from and why. He ended up understanding just a tad bit more, but still was questioning why I didn't want a "free" chair. Our upbringings were different. He's had to work for things in life, yes. But not like me. I know what its like to have 5.00 left in my bank account and only eat mac n'cheese and roman noddles for a month. I've worked 2 jobs on several occasions. I've worked really hard for what and where I am in life. And he just hasn't had to ever do that. I get it. He had talked to his mom on Monday, and said that I liked both chairs, just that I liked the one at Babies R'us a little more. And that we're going to look around some more just in case. Her response was "oh that's fine! you don't have to pick the one we picked out." ....... but notice what she didn't say. She didn't say "ok we'll pay for the one she wants."
So this turns me onto my mother. Maybe she'll buy me the chair. So I invite her up for the morning, breakfast and all, and we went to look at the chair. Maybe I can get her to love it and buy it for me.
As soon as she steps in my house and see's what I'm wearing... "you don't want to change? Why don't you put on a nicer top." Hi, my name is Kimberly and I'm 6 months pregnant with twins. Nice to meet you. I'm wearing maternity yoga pants and a t-shirt with flip flops. But thanks for trying.
I ended up missing a turn and instead of breakfast 1st, we ended up getting to the store first. We get to "the chair" and she only sit's in it for 1.2 seconds and give this look. And ask's me how am I supposed to get up from the chair with two babies. With my legs mom, just like you get up from any other chair? She immediately did NOT like the chair. So I of course, I start to cry. She goes on to explain how she can't afford 400.00 (after explaining the chair was on sale for 330.00). So I said, forget it! I'll buy the chair myself. Never mind you and this whole morning. I'm so over this drama with the freaking chair.
I might have not been that nice about it at the time. I did explain in some detail as to what the drama was with the in-laws, just not in detail.
She then wants to see everything I picked out on my registry. I said no... that's why I made a registry. So that you can look at the items at your leisure. I just want to go home at this point. But I pick out some of the larger things that I can remember. We get to the diapers and she ask's me if I would like a diaper service. A what? A diaper service, where they come once a week and pick up your dirty diapers. No mom, I seriously doubt they have something like that in the country. (She lives near DC, so I'm almost positive there is such a service there). So I asked her, you'd pay for a diaper service, but you wont pay for a chair?
Let me insert the conversation we had on the way to the store now. She ask's me if there was anything she can start buying. like onsies, etc. I said to her, "you mean to tell me that I'm almost due to give birth, and you haven't bought.... anything?? Not one thing? "well no..."
{meanwhile my in-laws have already dedicated ROOMS (plural) to my kids. Even my father (if you've read previous post's) has been more responsive that my own mother}
Let's also insert the fact that she's going to FL to visit my brother next week. This will be her 3rd trip down there since he's moved last summer.
So... you can afford to go to FL 3x, yet you can't afford to buy me a chair. And you haven't bought anything for your impending grandchildren.
wow.
Breakfast.
It was just terrible. She says to me "now I have a story to tell your aunt about how I made you cry.. just like she made her daughter cry.." huh??
Oh yea, and remind me to get candy for your cousin. (candy for my cousin in IRELAND, yet buying nothing for me...)
Baby boy moved just a bit and she see's my hand is on my belly. She proceeds to reach across the table (over food and drinks) to try and touch my belly. In the middle of the restaurant.
Mom, no, you can't do that. Now is not the time. And she looked as if she wanted to cry.
He wasn't moving consistently, maybe just readjusting and going back to sleep. And you have to kind of press on the belly still, not just slightly touching reaching over a table!!!
She mentions the fact that she wants to go back to the mall to go shopping for some outfits for her trip to FL. I begrudgingly drive back to the mall. She's floating around looking at stuff, my feet are starting to swell and I'm getting really uncomfortable. I tell her this, and she says "oh there's a chair in the dressing rooms..." >deep breath<
I forgot to mention, she opened zero doors for me or doots on me in anyway.
On the way home, I ask if I can give her some baby shower invitations so she can mail out to her side of the family.
"oh no... I really shouldn't do that. your aunt said I shouldn't be involved with anything baby shower related, do mom's even come to those things."
Mom, you can't mail out a few invites for me, to help me? I have to turn this thing around in less than a month, you can't help me?"
"No, I really shouldn't, but I can get you labels! yes let me get you labels!"
No mom, I don't want your labels, can you at least give me the addresses then? As she proceeds to shout out the addresses (we're in my drive way now, me at the door and her getting into her car). No mom! just EMAIL ME THE ADDRESSES.
Door closes, and I completely lose it. I'm so angry. What is wrong with my mother? I ended up getting a major migraine the rest of the day and into the wee hours of the night.
I've decided I'm kind of over her right now. I can't have this sort of stress right now. My husband and I decided just to get the chair, I'll pay half and he'll pay half (cause we don't want to reach into our savings just yet).
Done.
What a headache. I'm so sorry that it was such a stressful outing.
ReplyDeleteIt does sound stressful, ugh. I'm glad you're getting yourselves the chair.
ReplyDelete