A New Normal

>deep breath< 

Hey there. So, I've started this post over three times, lets see if this one will make the cut. It's a little boring, and nice and short update.

I've been feeling pretty good. Its been about 2 months since I miscarried and 3 months since my car accident. Life has finally calmed down enough to achieve a new normalcy.

After a lot of back + forth from the car insurance people, I finally got a settlement. I wasn't entirely happy about it, but it wasn't worth pursing and dragging it out anymore than it already had been. So with that I did end up getting a new car. A 4 door civic. I was nervous about the size. Even though this pregnancy didn't work out, I do plan on having a kid or two. And I know from experience that honda's last forever, so that's something I take into consideration when buying a car. I had my heart set on another CRV, but the payments would have been a strain. When the salesmen was pulling the car around I saw a women get out of her 4 door civic and get a car seat out. So I stopped her at the door and asked if it was realistic to have a smaller car with a family, she said "we love it!." So that made me feel a little bit better with going with the civic, and I love it too.

After 6 weeks of waiting, my period finally started. I was sooo excited to see it come along, and without any drugs. But then came the AWFUL cramps. I was couch ridden for most of the 1st day. It was a short 2 day cycle. The doctor said that this one didn't count b/c I wasn't yet in the negative with the HCG. So, now I wait for the 2nd cycle to show up which I'm hoping it will be next week so says my tracking app. We'll wait the next two cycles out and then we can begin to try again. I'm hoping that I'll be a metformin statistic again with just trying on our own for 2/3 cycles. Then we'll dive right into treatments in September if it hasn't happened yet.
I'm kind of scared/nervous/excited to start trying again. I'm trying to keep my DH off me until I know for sure that I'm out of that ovulation window. But I'm really trying to just focus on one step at a time. Right now, its about getting my head back in the game. Focusing on me for the next two months. Working out has been soooo good. I'm doing this thing called Soldierfit, where its classes like a bootcamp, but the atmosphere is amazing. Everyone is so nice and encouraging. I'm doing personal training every other week with a 100% certified cutie pie. And I've fall'n back in love with running again. Its kind of challenging b/c I work 65 hours a week, so whenever I have the nights off, I'm doing something active. I'm not even worried about my weight (yet) just b/c my hormones have been so all over the place. But as of this week I'm DONE with doctors. Even done with the dentist for 6 more months. Even just that is refreshing. My tank was running on low for the last 2/3 months. And I'm actually ok with waiting a few cycles before trying again. I'm really enjoying this time of being normal. I might even get to accrue some comp time at my full time job! My sick time has dwindled down to just 20 hours (from 70) and my vacation is down to 60 hours (from 70+).. 

So that's really kind of it for now. I welcome this new normal, bring on the day!