My 1st Official TWW

Our trying time was over Friday morning. And I started progesterone (ew) on Saturday. So, now we wait. I'll have my blood drawn on the 25th. And today I feel strangely at peace. Almost like, I did everything I was supposed to do so why stress? If it happens... great! if not, then we try again. Every time I go into the doctors and express any sort of concern I always get "your young, your fine, you've got plenty of time." Which is nice to hear. All I ever see is the dreaded '35' age and it all goes down hill. And all I keep thinking about is that for child #2, I'll have to do this all over again.. so I've got 3 years to do so.
Today I'm 3dpo. I'm stacking up my week so that I'm so busy I can't even think about dinner let alone if there is a baby growing inside me. I think this summer was such a huge disappointment that I'm just tired of being disappointed so I'll hold out on taking a test. Plus I'm not sure how long it will take the trigger (hcg) shot to wear off, and I don't want to get a false positive. I've got lots of work outs scheduled, working job#2 and trying to keep up on house work. Plus I've got the monthly deadline again at job#1 to meet by next Monday.

Anyways. I bumped into another blogger a while ago, more like a sponsored blogger and she had weekly challenges. One of the weeks' challenge was to journal. Well I do that already, but there were a set # of questions to answer, so I thought I'd go ahead and journal out those answers and I encourage you do to so too.

When you were young, what was your dream family? Focus on what your dreams were before you met your husband.

• My dreams.....  I really don't remember thinking to much about a future family. I always just figured it would happen.. Grow up, get married and have 2 kids. Easy peasy. Dreams before I had a husband, were more career focused. I wanted to 'be' someone one day. A manager, a controller (I'm in the accounting field), a decision maker. The start of my career was with Marriott hotels, where I was a front desk girl. I would help out with over night auditing every once in awhile, and the controller at the time saw some promise in me, and I quickly moved up into the accounting office. Starting with the Accounts Receivable and helped with Payables sometime. He had plans for a management path for me, but he ended up leaving and the new controller wasn't a fan of women in power. So I ended up being a hell of a AR associate. Did the best I could, knowing one day I could be the AR manager (at least).

What type of guy did you want to marry?

• A friend. It sounds sooo cliche, but I saw this guy from across the room and was immediately intrigued. like, who was this guy? I met DH at work 2 years before we even became a thing. We were fast friends. He was sort of my 1st guy friend and we got a long sooo well. I'm one big ball of sarcasm, and he was too. So we 'got' each other. He was a home grown kind of man. Had manors. Was smart. Tall dark and handsome. I had dated a lot when I was younger and he seemed like he could be it. Thats what I wanted in a man. Except that he already had a long term girlfriend.

When did you want to get married?

• Again, didn't really have a timeline of sorts. But I did want to get married and have at least one child before 30. My 30th birthday was a really hard one to get through because I didn't have the family part yet. 

What type of house did you think you'd live in?

• A finished one. I'll explain.  DH and I bought a house 9 years ago, knowing it was going to a fixer upper. Welp... we're still fixing it up. Its such a long story, but we're SO close to having it finished. Since we bought the house, we have completely re-done everything from floor to ceiling (and roof) and by ourselves. We even literally raise the roof (because the ceiling height was only 7 foot something, not the 8 foot standard it is today). So I'm excited to see what it will end up looking like once we have finished construction and painted/decorated, etc.   I will NEVER do this again.

When did you want to have children? How many did you want?

• Wanted to have at least one kid by 30, and I'd always wanted 2 or three. And for as long as I can remember, I have always wanted twins. Always.  Twins run in my family, every other generation and they do the same in DH side as well. Some of my cousins have had babies, and no twins yet. So I'm hoping and praying its me. 

There are a series of 7 questions. And I plan on spreading them out while on this TWW. A sort of changing the subject a little bit. 

Lastly, today is Monday. My weekend wasn't so grand. Just worked. And slept. I did the dishes! 

This afternoon I have a training session with my personal trainer. My DH is giving me his sessions so now I'm able to do an hour a week for at least 9/10 weeks. I'm seriously considering going low carb. I'm going to eat the rest of my food in my pantry, and maybe slowly go down in carbs week to week. I don't know that I'll go full blown Adkins. But it'll be close. I'm pretty desperate and determined to lose 20 lbs before starting IVF (if need be) next year. 

I hope that you had a wonderful weekend, and are ready for this week! whatever you may be facing, I pray that you have the same peace that I do, at least for today. 

Until next time <3